May 11, 2010
This day is like tepid water flowing between the fingers and off the hand. . .it is grey and still and uncommonly cool for the season. I stayed in front of the great room windows for a longer than usual time, and the reward was watching a pair of deer moving leisurely down the path toward the house, grazing as they came. We have powerful binoculars on a tripod at those windows, and I was able to see the deer as though I were just a few feet away. These are beautiful creatures on which the burden of wildness falls heavily – this year the Nebraska legislature spent a good deal of time discussing how to control their numbers because they appear to be trampling out civilization as we now know it. This morning’s pair was more like animation added to a beautifully detailed tapestry.
The bird feeders also provided several “worthy seed moments” (these are the times when one says with satisfaction “it’s worth it” in reference to large cash outlays for pounds and pounds of sunflower seeds and the like) A wildly colored lazuli bunting accompanied the indigo bunting as they all stopped to fill up before moving on to their breeding grounds.
Graduations, concerts and weddings are beginning to define the rest of May. Last weekend, for Concordia’s ceremonies, Charles put on his wonderful academic apparel and as we carefully hooked the stole in place, and placed the soft hat with the golden tassel “just so” I thought about the meanings of this splendid garment through the long past; surely at other times and places it signified a grandeur far distant from the ritual uses of 2010.
I remain caught in a cycle that is without a proper solution – I must eat for energy, therefore I must generate some appetite. The various medications have taken the bitter edge off many of the foods, so I have been able to eat. However, the intestinal system is not pleased with anything solid, and therefore any satisfaction about eating is erased by the misery following. At present, it is the liquid diet stuff that keeps me going, and its finest redeeming trait is that you can get the labels off the little plastic containers and make very nice “shakers” for the Vacation Bible school at First Church. Stay tuned.