Monday, December 10, 2007
With temperatures in the teens, snow on the ground and on every evergreen tree branch, winter speaks loudly at Sanctuary. The yard is very animated with many birds active around each of the feeding stations because in this cold weather, they must eat nearly their weight in seeds to keep warm. In the mornings, the snowbirds, sparrows, nuthatches, and cardinals are very cautious because the hawk will be coming through right above the ground looking for its breakfast. By noon, the birds are everywhere, cheerfully chattering and moving between the feeders and across the ground, not unlike a busy marketplace, and I know it is because the hawk has selected its meal from among the company, caught it, ate it, and is resting replete on some favorite branch.
Charles purchased a set of bell playing figures at an antique store, and they all strike one of two bells with little wands. . .the whole thing plays thirty five Christmas carols, and the set is charming and delightful – the only difficulty is that we have yet to be able to listen to all thirty five songs; the bells sound amazingly good for their size and shape, but I personally have lasted through just sixteen, and I believe that is about ten more than Charles has been able to tolerate. He usually comes past and shuts the mechanism off saying, “There. Now we’ve got the idea, and I’m sure the grandchildren will love it.” Since there is not a complete listing of the pieces, it may well be that the last ten or so are so beautiful it will bring tears to the eyes, but to date, we may have to let them be discovered by others.
The past days have been a new thing in my life; doing nothing to fight, or even argue, with the cancer in the blood. It would be very nice to pretend that it isn’t there, however, this is not possible because of how I feel. If I have an activity, I will spend the next day in exhaustion and pain. Generally, I find that I am doing less as the days go by, and I do not expect a morning when I will awaken and rise up feeling full of energy and wellness. This is not an easy thing and I have to beat back the darkness. Ultimately, hope is always there and Charles is always strong and positive – so we go forward with the prayer, “Lord God, you have called your servants to ventures of which we cannot see the ending, by paths as yet untrodden, through perils unknown. Give us faith to go out with good courage, not knowing where we go, but only that your hand is leading us and your love supporting us; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.”