September 30, 2008
“You are living in a state of grace” declares a good friend and so it is. These beautiful days continue as we watch the season of life and growth close down and prepare for the winter’s rest. In the last weeks, Monarch butterflies were flitting about gathering minute bits of sustenance before embarking on their long flights southward, and two mornings ago, we awakened to the sound of the wind increasing and coming from the north. When Alphie and I walked just before the sun came up, the clouds above were being pushed southward at a tremendous rate and I wished the Monarchs godspeed because I knew that they had already mounted the wind to commence their journey. We haven’t seen one anywhere in Sanctuary since.
Across the weekend, we gathered with friends and family to enjoy good food and conversation in a picnic setting near the house where Charles had placed pots of flowers and tables and chairs. As I looked at the animated faces around me, and listened to the laughter and stories that ebbed and flowed, I was keenly aware of a unique earth time which will never occur again in just such a way. This heightened perception of life has been a good outcome of having the dread illness called cancer; at first one can hardly walk forward at all, but as the days pass, times come that have joy and energy in them, and it is hard to describe how fine that is. (I also know that there are many others who suffer from the disease who have not had this respite but who remain brave and hopeful nevertheless.) Before entering the cancer community, there were many wonderful events in my life, and much happiness and delight, but I did not note them in the same way. In this aspect of my journey, I have become more, not less, and yes, I am surely living in a state of grace.